Handbook for the Recently Deceased
by Brigid the Fae
Summary: Congratulations  or Condolences  on obtaining a place in the afterlife! Keep the handbook with you at all times. We're told it reads like stereo instructions but we're sure a fresh soul like yourself can figure it out.


Chapter 1: Don't Panic!

It had happened in an instant. A blink of the eye. The speed of light. However you want to describe the situation, it had gone as quickly as it had come.

When she first achieved consciousness, she knew she wasn't where she was when... whatever happened happened. She was standing in a line that appeared to have no clear destination either front-ways or back-ways, surrounded by floating white mists that squeaked in protest.

Protest what? It's not like they were moving any faster, and she oddly felt that it didn't matter how long it took to get where they were going. Up ahead in the pathway stood a man, or what she assumed was a man. His skin was blue, with very short slicked back black hair and small horns that adorned the top of his skull. He carried a clipboard and was dressed much like that of an office worker. _Must be part of administration_, she mused. He was walking in her direction, making marks on the board as he went, and she could hear him shout to the area to stay calm. She felt for the guy, imagining that he must have to do this more often than she cared to think about.

"E-Excuse me, sir?" She asked as he came to stop by her side. "May I ask what is going on? I'm a bit confused."

The man seemed to appreciate her calm demeanor, for he smiled gratefully when answering. "Right now we're standing on the pathway to King Yema's office, where the souls will go to be judged."

"Souls? You mean to say-"

He nodded gravely, looking back and forth down the line. "I'm not sure what's going on back down there on Earth, but the body count has never been this high before." Noting her appearance he continued, "Say, you still have your body! That's peculiar, usually only fighters worthy are granted their physical bodies in the afterlife. May I have your name, miss?"

"Sure, it's Abigail Taiko. Believe me, sir, I'm just as confused as you are." she answered, watching as he scrolled down the list in his hands. His face lit up when he spoke next, and by her judgment, sounded quite pleased about the results.

"Ah, there you are! Yes, according to this, you are to meet with King Yema as soon as possible! Follow me, my dear."

He turned on his heel and proceeded down the line towards the front. Abigail glanced around before hurrying to catch up. "Are you sure this is alright? I thought we were supposed to wait in line for our turn?" she asked, feeling a little guilty for jumping ahead of so many souls.

Without turning he replied, "When a person dies that meets special requirements, they are given precedence over the rest. Think of it as a VIP treatment. I'm not sure how you qualify, but you do; that's what matters. It won't take King Yema long to decide your fate, but I have a feeling you won't have anything to worry about there."

* * *

><p>She was now standing outside a large red building that she was pretty sure influenced by Chinese culture, just by observing the structure. The "techie guy" as she mentally nicknamed him, asked her to remain outside while the soul currently inside was finishing up. He proceeded to go inside to speak with this King Yema, and promptly came out moments later to call Abigail in.<p>

Abigail didn't know what to expect when she stepped inside, and she was fairly certain she wouldn't have thought of an enormous red-skinned man in a business suit behind a desk stacked with ledger books. His booming voice startled her, and she hope that it wasn't obvious she flinched when he addressed her. It wasn't stern, like she expected, but polite... and probably tired, as well as loud.

"Yes, sir?" Her voice came out a bit of a squeak when she approached the desk; close enough for him to see her properly but so close that she was looking up under his nose as he leaned across the furniture.

"My, my, you've grown. Your father would be proud to see you today. How is your mother?"

King Yema _knew_ her father? Now she really was confused. Shaking the questions about that topic aside, she answered, "My mother passed away 3 years ago from pneumonia." The larger man looked taken aback for a moment before recognition crossed his facial features.

"Of course. Excuse me for asking, young one, that wasn't very tactful of me. My office has been quite hectic as of earlier today, if you couldn't tell."

Interest piqued again, Abigail ventured to ask, "What is going on, sir? I don't have any recollection of what happened before I woke in line. It was as if I blinked..."

"Yes, I imagine you are curious. I can't go into much detail right now, but I can say this," he paused to flip open another ledger and search for his pen, "Earth is under fire by the hands of a cruel monster named Majin Buu. Earth's strongest fighters are currently trying to put a stop to the massacre, and I can only hope that they succeed soon. I'll run out of books at this rate.

Now, let's get down to business, shall we? The fates have declared that you are to be given a special treatment. You will proceed to Heaven, but you will be guided down a separate path before you reach your destination. There is someone that requests your audience along the way. May you have a peaceful eternity, Miss Abigail Taiko."

"Techie guy" was back at her side, leading her to a doorway off to the right. Abigail spared one last glance at King Yema, who was already back to work, giving admittance to another soul that was Heaven-sent. She turned and followed her guide down the long highway.

"What did he mean by someone asking to see me?" she wondered out loud. Her guide happened to overhear her.

"I'm not sure exactly, miss. Whoever this person is isn't ordinary; what I mean is they must hold some significant importance. No one else would have admittance to access the journey from here to Heaven or Hell that isn't staff or soul."

* * *

><p>Abigail knew they were reaching the end of the corridor, because she could see the tiniest rays of light peeking through the cracks in the door. Her guide stopped just short of opening it before he turned to her.<p>

"Beyond this door is the journey to Heaven. Be very careful along the path, as there is no railing. If you fall, you will fall into Hell's dominion, and we may not be able to find you. As long as you stay aware you will be fine. As for your guest, I do not know who or where they will be along the path. They will not let any harm befall you, and will guide you along the way to your personal sanctuary." He turned the handle and pulled the door open.

She was momentarily blinded by the light, but as her irises adjusted she could see a long and winding white stone road among the yellow clouds. Once she stepped out she turned back to her guide, thanking him for assisting her. "Not a problem, miss. Have a safe journey." And she was left alone to watch the door close behind her.

Abigail looked around and gave a huff of air to calm herself. Taking each step slowly at first, she began to relax as she softly sang the first thing that came to mind:

"When I die and they lay me to rest ... Gonna go to the place that's the best ... When I lay me down to die ... Goin' up to the spirit in the sky … Goin' up to the spirit in the sky … That's where I'm gonna go when I die ... When I die and they lay me to rest … Gonna go to the place that's the best ..."


End file.
